If hangry is the combination of hungry and angry, then there has to be a name for this stage of the college football offseason.

The anticipation of the season after media days has devolved into boredom; but the start of the season is just far enough out that any “news” that breaks tends to degrade into outrage.

Boutrage? There’s something there, we’ll figure it out.

Case in point: In the last week, we’ve had the news that Kelly Bryant won’t receive a championship ring from Clemson, Sports Illustrated ranked college football programs, college football towns and college eateries, AND Missouri unveiled a new Tiger statue.

Spoiler alert: None went over well!

Save us, college football. You’re our only hope.

I’m tired of this manufactured boutrage. Bored-rage? We’re getting there.

Get me back into football season where I, as a fan, can be fittingly outraged over real things, not about whether a bronze Tiger looks too amphibial or whether Booches is the best burger in Columbia, let alone the whole damn nation (Take credit cards first, you cowards).

Oh, brother, let that hate flow through my veins for some REAL moments of indignation, like when Missouri unveils its uniforms for the first game and the piping is slightly different than the jerseys from the 80s. I’m talking about those situations where the outrage is not only acceptable but justified, like when the prices for beer at Memorial Stadium are announced and, stunningly, they’ll cost more than six bucks.

Yeah, yeah, we’ll have those meaningless moments where a field goal is missed or the officials botch a last-second call that costs Missouri a win. But that gut-reaction outrage will give way to the REAL outrage that I demand as a fan, where we scream at each other on Twitter and on message boards about whether Missouri even deserved to win that game or how they shouldn’t have let it be decided by one play, anyway.

Those are the stakes I need to justify my imminent and reasonable outrage. Wins and losses just provide us with the jumping-off point for the real emotions of college football -- the reactions to the reactions. That’s where I live, as a true fan.

Amateurs get sucked into reacting to the plays immediately; professionals bide their time to react to the reactions.

As a journalist, I’d chide those pros: “Let us tell you what’s important,” I’d type on my laptop in my office.

As a fan, I’m learning from them: “Let me explain the deep-state conspiracy against Missouri, as evident by the Kentucky game,” I tap on my phone in my bathroom.

We need football now, y’all. It needs to be August 31, stat. Enough of this going-through-the-motions bored outrage. Let’s get that real stuff, that organic stuff, the this-is-life-or-death stuff in here.

“How can you nit-pick a Missouri win?,” they’ll say.

“Well, here’s what the late arrival of Missouri’s student section says about today’s youth,” I’ll respond.